hey brother, do you still believe in one another?
by poisonrationalitie
Summary: An announcement leaves the Potter boys reeling and things come to a head. / Title credits to Avicii.


**A/N: For the Hogwarts Assignment #9, Arts & Crafts, Edward Burne-Jones - write about a brotherly relationship**

**Warnings for: swearing, homophobic slur, teen pregnancy, self-harm, drug mentions.**

**Wordcount: 1902**

**March 31, 2024**

Albus' stomach clenched, his hand hovering only an inch from James' bedroom door. Was he _really _the right person to do this? In fairness, was anyone? His parents were rather...preoccupied. Still, it wasn't like he knew anything about this. It was a problem he'd never encountered in his life, and most likely never would, all things considered. He racked his brains for the right words to say. What had he said to Louis? '_Congratulations!', _the first time, and not much, the other times. The whole thing had kind of lost its excitement by the third.

Still, as the middle child, he had to do something. He felt it was his duty, to be the peacemaker. Why else would middle children exist? He was already a disappointment to his kind everywhere, given his failure to try to do anything to make himself stand out. That settled it. He knocked on the door. "It's me," he added. "Your favourite brother." The bed creaked. A few moments later, James wrenched open the door.

"Only brother," he corrected. "Don't go getting ideas."

"Favourite sibling?" Albus tried.

"At the moment," James grunted. He left the door open and flung himself onto the normally-disused bed. Mum had left candles burning on the desk to try to clear the smell. Albus could still taste the musk on his tongue. James' school robes were still hanging up in the wardrobe, proudly above the suitcase he'd thrown in the bottom of it. One wardrobe door hung loosely off its hinges, and the other was long-gone, cut up for some scheme he and Fred had concocted. Part of his punishment had been to have to deal with missing a door on his wardrobe, but it had never bothered him much.

"Alright?" Albus asked, though he already knew the answer. He grabbed the pack of Drooble's Gum off the desk chair and tossed it onto the desk before sitting down. The seat was strangely wet. He tried not to think about it.

"What the bloody hell do you think?" James rolled onto his back. "My fifteen-year-old sister's up the fucking duff!" Albus winced, and stared at his knees. They were starting to wear through his trousers. Oh - fucksakes. Now he was thinking about _why _exactly they'd started to wear through, and Lily, and - he was going to be sick.

"I doubt she meant to be," Albus said.

"Does it matter if she meant to be? What the hell was she doing that she could even-"

"James," Albus cut in. "You're not going to tell me you hadn't at fifteen. I call bullshit."

"I'm not saying that." James sat up, grimacing. "But I'm saying I didn't get anyone pregnant at fifteen. I was _smart._"

"I'm forced to agree," Albus said.

"Thank you! Thank you!" James threw his arms in the air. "So you can admit that. But to Mum and Dad, it's not going to fucking matter. They won't blame Lily, they won't even blame Professor Longbottom's kid -"

"Linden."

"-whatshisname, they'll blame _me. _For being a shitty influence, or whatever. It'll be my fault, like it always is whenever you or Lils do something out of line. You guys get a slap on the wrist and I get a whole bloody lecture for something I haven't even done!"

"Really?" Albus said, voice flat. "_You _suffer for our actions?"

"Yes, I fucking well do! When you got caught breaking curfew when you went back after New Year's, Mum flooed round and gave me a fucking _flogging. _She came to _my _place to tell _me _off in front of all _my_ mates because _you _were tugging that blond bastard's cock after ten!"

"_Don't _have a go at me," Albus said. His fingernails dug into his palms. "I came up here to help you, James, Godric's sake. Do you have to make all this about you? About you maybe getting a lecture? This is going to change Lily's life!"

"Don't tell me how to be a brother. You're at school with Lily still, why weren't you fucking there keeping an eye on her? Why didn't she trust you enough that she could talk to her brother who is at fucking school with her when she first found out? Why didn't you pick up that something was wrong? I write to her three times a week, do you even talk to her that much?" James leapt to his feet. Albus gripped the arms of the chair, palms stinging. _I've been busy, _he thought. _I actually study for my N.E. , James. _ "You're too busy fucking Malfoy in the corridors -"

"So what?" Albus demanded. "I'm a shit brother because I'm gay?" His voice cracked.

"What are you on? I never fucking said that. I don't give a fuck that you're gay -"

"Then why bring up Scorpius? You don't see me bringing up whatever girl you're shagging this week!" Albus' pulse pounded in his neck.

"_Because, _you're obsessed with him!" James ran his fingers through his hair. "You don't fucking bother with me or Lily or Mum or Dad or fucking anyone because all you care about is your stupid fucking boyfriend!"

"I'm sorry I'm in a healthy, committed relationship, James," Albus said. "I'm so terrible. My deepest apologies."

"No! Chip on your shoulder, much?" James turned on his heel, pacing by the side of the bed, pulling at wayward strands of hair. "I don't care what Scorpius has between his legs, but it's getting in the way of our family."

"Sorry, I'll fuck off then." Albus pushed himself off. "I'll go get my faggot boyfriend and we'll go fucking disappear so we don't get in the road."

"Don't you fucking dare," James said, whirling around to face his brother. "If you're trying to say that I've said that -"

"Haven't half the boys you live with?"

"I would _never. _I would fucking _never. _I get that you fucking loathe that I have friends, that I have a good time, that people actually fucking like me, but you don't get to paint me as shit that I'm not. Say I'm a fucking crackhead, say I'm lazy, got no ambition, I don't give a fuck, but Albus, I have _always _supported you in this. Okay? I got around in a rainbow kit at school for a fucking week after it came out about you and him! You think I didn't get shit for that?"

"You did it for a laugh!" Albus spat. "You pretend you're all cool with shit and make a big fucking joke out of it. You're one of those people who befriends the kids with autism or whatever for a huge fucking laugh and _nobody _can get you on it because you're obstensibly friends." He stormed towards the door, only stopping when he saw James lift his leg.

James drove his foot into his wardrobe. Albus' heart missed a beat. It didn't topple, but almost. The wood split.

"Fuck!" James yelled, ripping his foot from the hole he'd created.

"Fuckwit," Albus said, grabbing the handle.

"So you're gonna go dob me in to Mum and Dad?" James said, leaning against the wall. "While they're trying to deal with something like what you said, could change Lils' whole life, you're gonna go tell them that I'm a mean big brother? You're eighteen! Grow the fuck up, Albus." His hand slacked. He refused to turn to look at James. He couldn't face it. The floor trembled slightly as James hopped around, grunting. He did have a point. This spat was the last thing his parents would care about right now. The bed groaned, and there was silence. It filled up Albus' lungs until he couldn't breathe. It made his limbs feel like lead. His eyes were burning.

"I don't know how we're brothers, sometimes," Albus said, mainly to the door. The door offered no comfort. It was just a door. Faint black marks gave it some character, but it was still a door. "I feel like we're speaking different languages."

"I'm not," James said. "Like you always say, I barely know English." Albus swallowed hard. It was like a pin to his pinky toe.

"I don't mean to be a prick." Albus turned his head slightly, so it was half to the door and half to James' dresser. It was an improvement. "It's hard enough with Mum and Dad's legacies, but you're a Quidditch star, you're universally beloved, and you're worshipped like a king. You're the cool one, and Lily's the sweet one, and I'm the one with knobbly knees."  
"You're more than knobbly knees," said James. "Your nose is a bit crooked, too." A laugh rose in his stomach despite himself. He didn't let it escape.

"Because _you_ said I'd be able to magic if I jumped out of that tree," Albus reminded him, turning around. James sat on the bed, nursing his foot. James' lips quivered, and he flopped onto his back.

"I'm sorry, Al," he said. "Everything's a bit much."

"I know." Albus dropped his hand from the handle. He closed the gap and fell back onto James' bed. A spring lolled out of the side. He stared at the roof. _Pregnant. _His baby sister was _pregnant. _There was nearly three years between them, with he on the older end of his year at school, and she on the younger of hers. He had very fuzzy memories of her in a carrier, possibly partially photograph-induced. She still seemed like a baby herself. They'd nearly thought themselves clear of any teen pregnancy, with James due to be twenty in the summer. It would be weird. He couldn't really imagine James being twenty, anymore than he could imagine Lily being a mother. James had one of those faces that didn't change from the toddler years. He still had the smattering of brown freckles on his cheeks, and his grin still looked like he was about to tell you he'd dropped Lucy's bunny toy down the loo. It helped that he still couldn't grow a beard. Neither of the Potter boys could. Hugo, the bona fide baby of the family, only fourteen, never let them forget it when he shaved twice a week.

"I'm sorry too," Albus said. "I love you, you know."

"What?" James rolled onto his side, squinting.

"Don't make me say it again," Albus said. "I'm sorry for having a go at you. And - I'll be here. For Lily, from now on. And for you."

"I 'don't make me say it again' you too," James grinned, reaching to ruffle his hair. "Look, if Lily has this kid, I'll let you be the cool uncle, how about that? I'll teach you how."

"You don't even know how to be a cool uncle."

"I reckon I'd be better at it than you."

"I could be a cool uncle! I'd make cool potions for him."  
"The key to every little kid's heart. _Potions. _Godric, was Uncle Percy your favourite uncle?"

"So what if he was?"

"Everyone's favourite was Uncle Charlie! He was the cool uncle."

"You think you're the Uncle Charlie of our generation?"

"I will be, if I'm the cool uncle. Cool uncle equals Uncle Charlie. Boom. Arithmancy."

"Helga save me."

"Come off!"

"I can be a cool uncle. Maybe the kid'll be a Slytherin in the making."

"Far out, don't doom him! I'll be the cool uncle, and the kid'll be a little lion."  
"You're on."


End file.
